y did u give ur computer a hand job?
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I smell stomach acid.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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