No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
