His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
