I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
