I think my vagina is haunted
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
