R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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