Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Randomize
