I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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