We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize