Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
