OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
