I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
farters have to be the big spoon...
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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