don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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