guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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