Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Randomize