Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
