hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Randomize