Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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