you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
