I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
