I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
