so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize