But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Duck Duck Cougar?
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
