i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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