I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
