talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
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