I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
