And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
