Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
