haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
