very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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