so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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