you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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