Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
