I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
