enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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