her vagina looked like bernie madoff
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
