i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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