Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
