if i can run in heels then i can drive
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
