How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
