We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
