He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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