i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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