We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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