I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
