I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
