I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
