he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
