I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I CAN MOONWALK!
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
