as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
