Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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