I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize